I think the only time I read Vogue is stretching after ballet classes eating a post-workout granola bar or tangerine or at the dog park (sorry for completely over-posting pictures of my weenie dog, but I’m just trying to get him a little tanner because he’s so white right now…he’s a piebald dachshund just in case you have not seen pictures of him).
Anyway, as I walked in the uptown dog park with my huge Kate Landry tote storing my recent purchase from Whole Foods as of 5 minutes ago, a pint of NadaMoo chocolate ice cream, and Vogue, I pick my usual spot in the corner away from the trees to get my dosage of Vitamin C and D or whatever other millions of health benefits the doctors keep telling me about (pretty much I’m deficient in everything, probably explaining my unusual stories…).
Because I never look shady, I pull out my pint of chocolate ice cream (already thinking of at least 3 excuses to tell the dog park employees if they ask why I have outside food), and start eating away…and of all flavors, I would have chocolate, knowing that chocolate is a death sentence for all dogs. How selfish.
After demolishing my pint of glorious, dairy-free ice cream, I take out my divine book of Vogue and start reading, 10 minutes later, there I am trying to flip the page and realize the dirt that got on the corner of a page.
Marveled, I noticed it was chocolate stains I had spread throughout the pages of beautiful Vogue, like a 5 year old…so proud.
Then I thought to myself, real Vogue fans always have their magazine with them and reading Vogue throughout any activity….baths, stretching, eating, laying out, or in my case, dog parking. So of course, there should be evidence of your active lifestyle among the pages of Vogue!
All to say, I’m sure Vogue is proud and…I’m so happy my subscription comes with a monthly electronic subscription just in case awesome, clumsy people like me smear every author’s precious words in Vogue with chocolate or Lush bath bomb bumbles.
Thanks Vogue for being a part of my life!